best of frens

Today I found a friend,
Who knew everything I felt.
She knew my every weakness,
And the problems I've been dealt.
She understood my wonders,
And listened to my dreams.
She listened to how I felt about life and love,
And knew what it all means.

Not once did she interrupt me,
Or tell me I was wrong.
She understood what I was going through,
And promised she'd stay long

I reached out to this friend
To show her that i care
To pull her close and let her know
How much I need her there

I went to hold her hand
To pull her a bit nearer
And realized that this perfect friend I found
Was nothing but my mirror.

best friend.. seems like i remember encountering this two-word many times, especially when i was in high school, or maybe primary school as well.

when i was in kindergarten, i have a lot of frens, but no really close frens. Well, i guess i assumed all of my frens r my BEST frens. i play with everybody, regardless of their age and gender (it makes me wonder y children doesn't hv the prejudice inside them) . what matter is that u hv someone to talk, sing and play with.

when i was in my primary school, i had a best fren. a chinese girl by the name YK Chan. we had the time of our life. since out house is only a block away, we went by the same bus and coincidently stay in the same class in Standard 1. (i cant remember the following years whether we're in the same class or not ). hehe remembered calling her "kunyit". her name sounds almost like that if read the other way around. we went to each others bday parties and shared our lunch. we're always in the same team when we played lompat getah. and we even took turns to be the bus assistant (thank u uncle Kok, ure the most understanding and sporting bus driver i ever knew). then when i was in Std 4, i moved to Terengganu. in the beginning, we always wrote letters to each other. but time goes by, i hv my own stuff to do, so do u. the letters get lesser and lesser. one day, i went to Subang, and wanted to visit u. it was friday. i knocked on ur gate, and ur mum answered it. she called u down. unfortunately, ure sleepy and just told me to come later. ur were still in ur school uniform, i knew u just returned from school but couldn't u just come to the gate and we can talk for a while. just to catch up on things, even for 1 minute?? dissapointed, i returned home and felt that i've lost a fren. i came from terengganu for the w'end, it's far away. yet, u don't even have a minute to talk to me?

when i was in my primary school in terengganu, i had a bestfren. a guy named Nazri (Nz). i like him coz he's small and cute. and of course, i like to bully him. he was in the class next door. we go to school together, lilbrary together, swim together and we even shared our bicycle lock at school. i guess our classmates really noticed our frenship coz everytime Nz got into trouble, his classmates will call me to their class (as if i could help. hehe). Still remeber the fact that his little sister called him "adik" coz he's the youngest guy (& the smallest physically) among the siblings. But when i went to high school, he moved away and we lost contact. last year, someone in Frenster msg me asking is Nz the guy i meant when i said i want to meet "Nazri" in my profile. when i msg her back, she never reply.. it makes me wonder.. is her his gf? maybe she's jealous of our freiendship once upon a time?? wth.. cm aku nk kebas balak org jek.. ntah ape-ape.

when i was in (lower) high school, i meet a girl name Niha. we got so close since we're both staying in the dorm. we're in the same dorm & same class. we go to dewan makan together, pray together, school together, study, outing.. basically everything lah. ahaha among the people in the dorm, i felt connected to her as we're both from KL. then, i left for MRSM. she stayed in the same school. i still remember she saying, " who's going to talk with her? who's going to do everything with her? prep? eat? pusing-pusing KayTee town ? i feel as if i'm lost already..". she was a popular girl in school, so i told her she will hv someone for her. we are still frens. only far apart. it's not that we're not going to c each other again.

when i was in MRSM, i didnt hv a best fren. tonnes of close ones, but not to the level to say that they're best frens. i felt that i shlouldnt burden them if i hv problem. i prefer to keep it to myself. they're frens for fun. i do helped if they hv problems, but not vice-versa. to me best frens r someone who will be with u thru the thick and thin, fun and sadness. but i choose them for the fun side. i don't think i'll never fiind someone to share my pain, maybe simply b'coz i don't want to.

when i was in prep school, the situation was same like in MRSM. frens r frens. i do hv close frens, but nothing more deep.

when i was in US, closest person i would say is my roommate, Julia. although we're roommates for the last 2 years, she's the easiest and fun person to talk to. being me, i wont disclose the problematic and complicated situation that i's having. if so, only on the surface; after the issue was over. and of course, in a cool manner. like the issue was nothing. and i think she understands, coz she never asked more..

now i'm working and believe me, i think i've left my last resort to find a best friend. plus, i am the ONLY person here. i hv to make new frens. it's not hard nor easy. the environment is not on my side. there r certain barriers in the atmosphere. i wont say what, just think of the possibilities.

i met YK Chan again when i was in prep school. it turns out she's taking medic and i'm in engineering. 2 opposite field. we talk, but not as before. i don't even know where she is now. i believe somewhere in the Europe. i know i could contact her coz my frens r her frens too. but what to talk about? she's in the final year, so she'll be bz..

i'm still good fren with Niiha. she's in KL and i'm in Kulim. we only met once in 2 months, but we sometimes chat. of course, when we met.. we could talk for hours and hours. hehe girls talk lah. gossip-gossip a bit lol! we're both working, so i guess the communication will be more less. it's true that it's easier to talk if ure in the same boat. so i wonder, what else do we hv to talk about? my life is soooo boring..

as for Julia. so far, we're still connected thru phone n mail. since i guess we're closed for a longer period and most of our Uni frens r same, maybe we'll be frens longer (and forever). it's too early to say, but we'll see.. for now, my bestfren is still ME..

* Woo.. y do i sound depressed??